Merry Christmas

To all my Democratic family and friends:

Please accept my best wishes for an environmentally sensitive, politically correct, socially responsible, health-conscious, gender-neutral, Merry Christmas or Happy Kwanza, or Happy Holiday or celebration of the winter solstice, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice. These wishes or sent to you, of course, with the utmost respect and sensitivity for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all, as the case may be.

I also wish you financial success, personal fulfillment and good health in this the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2009, but not without due respect for your sensitivities of the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country, of course. Also in wishing you a financial success that is not to imply that you seek to acquire more that your fair share of earth’s bounty or that your financial success would be acquired at the expense of others or that you would use that financial success to engage in vulgar consumerism; I just hope you have all you need to be happy. Also, this wish is made without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the recipient of these good wishes. Gee, I hope I haven’t offended you.

To my very religious conservative friends and family:

Merry Christmas! I apologize if I sent you a secular Christmas card instead of religious card or if I inadvertently said "Happy Holidays"; and yes, I know Christ is the reason for the Christ-mas season!

To everyone else:

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

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